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A LEGEND OF ZELDA ROLEPLAY
Welcome to ZRP! We are an non-canon RP site with an original tale taking place within the
lore of the Zelda Franchise. While the events of this site are entirely non-canon, we take advantage of the canons of other
games to explain its story fully. As such, we are located within the CANON TIMELINE. Do you like what you see? If so, feel free
to register and join our story! If you have any questions, you can join our discord, located in our important links!
11/12/21 GUESS WHO'S BACK! Thats right, and we are cooking up a good ol reset for everyone. Please be patient as things will be a little empty as we archive. Pop into discord if you have questions.
Hello! I'll be looking over your app today. Before we can approve you there are a few things that will need revision.
First off - his age. It says 30 (Physically), which is fine and dandy, however we require to know what his ACTUAL age is, and it must make sense for the race he is.
Which brings me to my next point - his race. By Terminan, I assume you mean Hylian from Termina? If that's the case, please put human or hylian as the race. In Termina, they are still considered to be called Hylians.
Your personality is a little bit confusing to me. It sounds like you're more so explaining his ability in combat and body type rather than actual traits to his personality. More so just notifying you in case you put something in the wrong area.
His history gives me a few concerns: below, I'll quote the following.
"Little is known of this strange tribal warrior's background save for his exploits around Termina. "
What are these exploits? The point of a history is to give us some information. It's not giving away anything in character, because obviously we wouldn't metagame. But we would like to know more for what you mean by this. If people know about these exploits, shouldn't they know what they even were?
"Raven excels in tribalistic and forgotten rituals used for dealing with powerful forces."
Can we get a little bit of info on what this means? What are these forgotten rituals? That's something we'll need to get some in depth information on. This could be considered as magic, and require a slot.
"Some rumors say the tribe and realm he claims to hail from are nothing more than myth."
Can we get some info on this tribe? If they're as relevant as Termina as you make them sound, it would be good to know more about them and why people know who they are.
"Having heard trouble is stirring in Hyrule Raven walks the path of the drifter drawn to challenge and promises of future legends."
The final concern is his knowledge of Hyrule. No one in Termina knows about Hyrule save for probably the mayor of Clocktown and Alexander and the great fairies, and that is only because of their encounters with the Hero of Time.
There would be no possible way for Raven to have heard about the trouble going on in Hyrule because of two factors: time and disclosure.
Time passes differently in Termina. While 600 years have passed in Hyrule since the Ocarina of Time/Majora's Mask era, in Termina only 20 have passed. So three days in Termina would be an entire three months to Hyrule. The trouble in Hyrule would have been aa year prior, and at the moment, there is no one alive who has traveled between the two realms within that time. So there is no way he would have heard about this.
Now onto magic! While energy manipulation is all fine and dandy, we need a little bit more information than that, as well as a format members should follow.
Please list the spell as the following:
SPELL NAME: details of spell goes here
We need to know how powerful this spell is. Telling us you can shoot bolts of energy isn't enough. How big are these bolts? How much damage do they do? What kind of energy (element) is it?
And last, you completely erased the last part of the template which we require by all members.
PLAYER ALIAS: your tag obviously FACE CLAIM: self explanitory REFERENCE: where did you find this site from ALTS: do you have any other chars?
Once you clean your app up a little bit, we can move closer to getting you approved!
Hello there! I'm Nova and I am here to grade your redux! However it is not pleasant to tell you that I suggest a complete do-over, and for a few reasons; but the large one is that you completely disregarded what Debisis told you, --or you only read at least half of what he wrote.
You expanded on his personality, and it was sufficient until the second paragraph where you just left in his outwards appearance; THERE IS A SECTION FOR APPEARANCE. A personality is how they act, much more than how they present themselves. Maybe try expanding on his motivations/fears/dislikes/ etc. How would he react upon coming in contact with some of these? Does his bullheaded determination mean that he would do anything to achieve his goals?
His Age. Just because he is from Termina, does not mean he is 230 years old. Time passes differently there compared to Hyrule, but a year there is still only a year. He would still only be 30 years old despite how much time has passed in Hyrule.
The Appearance is a bit sub par, and the previous paragraph specified that currently resides in personality would find a better home in this section. There is more to appearance than just clothing and aesthetic features, and the second paragraph in your personality brushes up on this. The way they talk, walk and hold themselves in and OUT OF BATTLE is just as important than their physical weight and height ( which you did not clarify ).
Magic is too vague. There is alot more you can put into this description. Such as going over how many he can fire before feeling some kind of fatigue. I really doubt that he is a master spell craft with only possessing one spell, so keep that in mind, and you still didn't specify how big the energy bolts are LIKE DEBISIS SAID.
And Finally, History. Oh boy! I have to reiterate and say, I really doubt that you read the entirety of what Debisis had to say. That, or you disregarded it entirely. Its nice that you gave us some more information but on the other hand, this history for your character goes against too many rules.
The first one is metagamming. Debisis told you that in CANON PLOT, Termina as a whole does not know about Hyrule. Except for the few CANON PC's such as Alexander ( which is not the village elder ), the mayor ( which is not the village elder ) and some fairies ( which is not the village elder ). So once more, there is no possible way, that your character would be from Termina, and end up in Hyrule by the end of your history. Its not happening. If you want to be from Termina, then you are going to be IN Termina until you RP in character a way to Hyrule, which may or may not be soon. My suggestion, be from Hyrule. There is nothing special going on in Termina anyways.
→ A ↓ → A ↓ . What. In. The. Hell. Oh so now your character is the main protag eh? And it was necessary to use the game controls? I'm going to put a big fat NOPE on this. This is disregarding site CANON plot that was written by staff.
After looking over the remainder of your history... I can not say much else than, STOP TRYING TO REWRITE THE PLOT WE HAVE WROTE! You can either follow it, or you will not be approved.
Using the song of time
Meeting and kissing The Goddess of Time (which is canonically Hylia)
Becoming Immortal
All of this gets a BIG NOPE! This site has a Link, if you want to play the main squeeze cheese protag in this fashion I suggest going to play OOT. This is an RP forum hun, where people write stories based on the events in this setting, not to rewrite canon plot however you wish. Honestly the entirety of staff does not know how to address your desire to play this type of a character, but at the time, this gary stu is getting a DENIED tag. I suggest starting over, coming up with an original plot that does not require manipulating our site canon plot to your whim, and taking the advice given by not only myself, but Debisis as well. Please try again, with a bit more earnest effort and make sure to read over the plot given by staff.